The happiest time of your life...

‘What is the happiest you’ve ever been?’

It’s the kind of honest, to-the-point question that seems to be bubbling out of my six-year-old son Finn frequently this year. This zinger he sprung on me as my hand was exploring the milky, fruity, and toasty depths of the breakfast kitchen sink in search of the plug. 

Multi-tasking and drawing on my mashup of philosophical leanings*, I had a ready-made answer on the tip of my tongue. Life is all about living in the present my son.  

‘Well, right now, Finn, this is the happiest I’ve ever been.’

Which he wasn’t buying. 

So, bending Zen just a little, I reached for a near memory and tried again as I spun around quickly towards the bin with the oozing sink strainer in my hand. 

‘Ah, it was probably the holiday we all just got back from. That was super fun!’

But he still wasn’t pleased with my answer. He wanted me to dig into my past and tell him about a time of extreme happiness, like Disneyland, the videogame arcade, and an ice cream cake all rolled into one. I told him I’d think about it during the day and report back at bedtime. 

True to my word, thoughts popped into my mind between emails, meetings, and cups of coffee. There were the big life memories I knew I probably should have said were my happiest: my wedding day, or and the days that Finn and Atlas were born. Or maybe it was a great holiday, a great meal or party, or big moments like selling a business or buying a house. 

By the afternoon, I was clear. The happiest moment of my life was in 2007. Kaitlin and I had just sold everything we owned and moved to Kenya. We had almost no money, were living in a tin hut with a dirt floor with no electricity or running water and were working at a local aid project.

So, what made this the best?

1. I had escaped something that was no longer the right path for me (the Navy). 

2. I was very deliberately taking my first steps towards a new life that felt like the right path for me. (humanitarian work). 

3. I was making these steps with the love of my life (Kaitlin). 

Am I happy now, in the present? Absolutely. Do I feel like the happiest moment of my life might be ahead of me? Optimistically, yes, I do. But do I feel OK saying to Finn that this moment was my happiest, sure.

If you are honest with yourself, what is the happiest you’ve ever been?